Tuldas Xenophon


#1

I am sorry to be breaking my silence in such a manner, but I have a very sad announcement to make.

Our friend Tuldas Xenophon died this past Saturday, 7/29/2017. I do not have any further details at this time.

I have been told that there will be a memorial for him this coming Sunday, 8/5 in Marlborough, MA. If you wish to attend his memorial service, which I am told is to be a small, private gathering, contact the organizer through the memorial page.

His funeral will be in Washington State at a later date; again, I will post details as soon as I have them.

Also, In lieu of flowers, we ask that you make a donation in Tuldas’ name to the Children’s Miracle Network of Hospitals through his ExtraLife fund raising page


#2

Well shit.


#3

I’m so sorry for your loss.


#4

I don’t recall if you knew him or not. He was one of our earlier posters, I think, but he had some mental health issues and dropped off for a while. He wasn’t ever really able to get his life back together - he had some serious demons he had to fight every day.


#5

I remember him, but didn’t know he had issues, or actually, everyone has issues, but didn’t know the specific ones. I’ve all been on here so long it’s hard to remember, especially since I took a few year break in the middle there.

I’ve assumed some percentage of people that have left here have died. I am sorry to hear about this one. (This is what “Well Shit” meant above.)


#6

His were… on a somewhat greater level.

I’m not entirely comfortable talking about it, inasmuch as I can’t exactly get his permission. But from what I know, these were issues which, even with medication and treatment, well and truly made it impossible for him to work and had a severe effect on his relationships. I know he sought treatment and worked very hard to lead a stable and productive life.


#7

I guess this is as good a place to share as anywhere.

I first knew Tuldas through the boards - the old ones, in '06, I think that was when it was on NANC.

Like I said, Tuldas had serious mental health problems. I didn’t really know about it until I guess 2012. We communicated a little bit.He told me somewhat about how his life fell apart. I tried to be supportive, but we were never really close. Honestly I’m not exactly the best person to go to for emotional support. I sent him a few things that he needed - he had, ah, rather meager resources and was reliant on SSI.

For myself, I will always wonder if, had I been more available, more supportive, maybe he’d still be here. That’s a guilt I’m going to have to live with.


#8

Not knowing the details this is presumptuous, but it’s not like I’ve never been accused of that before. I’d say that if meds and treatment can’t fix it a bit more help from a single person, or multiple, wouldn’t have made the difference. I’d try to look at it as comfort offered to someone with a chronic disease. Can you cure it, or make it go into remission, no, but it makes it better.

As an old pastor I had was a fan of saying, guilt is a useless emotion. It doesn’t make you feel better, it doesn’t change what happened, and half the time you don’t deserve as much credit for what happened as you think. It sours your future decisions by comparing them to past “mistakes” and generally messes with your life.


#9

Well that sucks. I was unaware that he had these issues but having lost a dear friend in this manner 15 years ago I’m familiar with the process. It sucks that even with medication and treatment he couldn’t get things on track.


#10

Guys, as tuldas’s uncle from Washington state we lost touch with him as he left Washington in his seeming self quest. I appreciate your kind words and seems as you knew him more than most of his family
At this stage of his life. Really sucks shit drives ppl to this solution.


#11

I’m sorry to be dredging this up a year later, and for it being the sole reason I’ve registered an account here, but I’m looking to see if this is a friend that I know. The day of last contact with him is the same as DOD, and I only found this because ‘tuldas’ is an otherwise unused term on the internet. There are correlations here, but I’m wondering if anyone can confirm knowing other things… did your Tuldas also play any of these games: EVE Online, Harvest Moon, Pathfinder, Diablo? Did he recently (as of that time) get a new desk and/or monitor arrangement, or play often on a 3DS system? I chatted with my friend fairly regularly until he suddenly stopped after that day, and have been wondering ever since. Also, did he use ‘Tuldas’ as his username in this forum? (So I might search his posts for clues)

Again I’m sorry to be pulling this back up almost exactly 1 year later, but I hope you understand.


#12

He did use “Tuldas” as his user name, but that was in one of the previous incarnations of the forum. I don’t think he ever posted in this incarnation (though I couldn’t be 100% sure).
I don’t know whether the previous incarnations are actually available @Lee_Ars would be able to tell you that. There is someone else who has some of the old stuff, but I’m not sure who that is - was it @RRabbit42?

As for the gaming questions, it was a very long time ago so I can’t remember that I’m afraid.


#13

Thanks for responding! I guess I’ll hope one of them can help :3 unfortunately he never introduced me to any of his other friends so this is the only lead I’ve got. That and his skype user name was simply ‘tuldas’ which is what led me to search for that (I mostly knew my friend by another name) … hm, I probably should have started with sharing that clue xD


#14

I saved about 60 messages. I haven’t check them all, but most of the references to Tuldas were for people that included one of his quotes in their signature area: “I have all the tact and subtlety of a tank.”


#15

Alas, I can offer relatively little clarity. I know his legal name and the address he lived at - but I don’t think those will help here. The only games I specifically know he played were Magic: the Gathering and Shadowrun.

I’m a bit dubious of him having recently changed his gaming setup: he was of very meager means. Same WRT to the 3DS. He never mentioned any particular computer games nor any hardware, but that doesn’t mean he never played, just that it did not come up - he clearly did some gaming, after all.


#16

I’m just bringing this up just one last time as it was one year ago today, and I’ve basically accepted the probability that we knew the same person. I got the impression that you might not have talked to him much for a while, so in this I’ll tell you a bit about the person I knew in the last weeks that I got to know him.

We talked somewhat frequently, but irregularly, using Skype. Sometimes we’d go a few weeks without talking, and sometimes we’d go weeks talking every day, sometimes a little and sometimes a lot. In the last couple days we didn’t talk much, and his last message - on this date last year - was in response to a funny picture that someone else had given me, and his response was simply :3

Hmm let’s see… as I’m sure you all knew: he was friendly and thoughtful, smart, generous when he could be … he had recently put a computer together for a friend who needed one in a hurry.

In the last couple weeks he told me that he had a bad falling-out with his Pathfinder group, and filling that void he picked up playing Diablo III and paticularly the then-new Necromancer class, and was having a geat time with it; with retro-vision of course I wish that I had joined him in playing, but at the time (and still) I don’t have a lot of love for the game. Shortly before that event it was early july and mention of fireworks, he shared one of his photos with me https://www.deviantart.com/tuldas/art/Fireworks-59159386

As I mentioned before he had somewhat upgraded his computer system, having an array of 3 monitors. I joked that I could imagine him sitting at his great new 3-screen setup and playing on his 3DS; he admitted that he was playing a mobile phone game just before that, laughs were had :3 and with that he took a wiiiiiiiide screenshot of an industrial mega-complex space station that we owned in EVE Online, which he played on-and-off and really liked. It kinda requires a subscription which he couldn’t always afford. Here’s the screenshot!

Anyway, that’s just in the last couple months, I’m mostly going through my skype message history to bring you these pictures and events, I don’t want to do/share too much in case I’m bothering people xD Let me know if you want to know more, I’ll gladly share more.

Have a nice day o7