Things you wish the other driver could hear, v3.0


Happens here as well.

Three lane road. Farting along in the middle lane at a relaxed 75km/h after a stop at a traffic light.

Road narrows from the left to a two-lane road.

Still puttering away in the middle lane (now the leftmost lane after the merge), whereupon such a noise from a hooter arrested my attention on my left. Seems somebody was trying to gun for the gap between my car and the narrowing road, but failed, and was most upset that I did not give him a chance. Aw shame.

Just waved at him and drove on like nothing happened.


Sorry to disagree but in some places, that’s what you’re supposed to do…


Seems like this was discussed before.

In some places, they have instituted “zipper merge”, but in everyplace I’ve lived, you’re supposed to plan ahead and merge earlier. But instead there are a ton of bozos who wait until the last minute, or worse, whip out to the right, zip ahead, and cut someone off while they squeeze in where they don’t belong, inconveniencing person they cut off who has to hit the brakes and maybe even stop, which just makes the backup worse for eveyone else down the line. (“Just gotta get ahead of three more cars!”)

To me, the exception is when you’re crawling along, and some jackass is apparently incapable of keeping pace and has had enough room for three cars and a dump truck in front of them for the last friggin mile. Yeah, I’m going to try to get ahead of that dipshit if at all possible. Especially in 2+ lanes going the same way and a stream of cars from the next lane are moving in front of Mr. or Ms. Inattentive. Extra bonus when they’re reading War and Peace on their phone. Perfect time to make use of those extra pennies in the console… toss a couple out the window and let them ping off the car and bring them back to reality.

Sorry, I just got back from a client’s office and it took me twice as long as it should have because of traffic.


The dashed line separating each lane means you can move over to the main lane at any time. CaffeinatedNoms, if traffic is supposed to wait until the point where the road narrows into one lane, then they need to use a solid line to show you’re not supposed to move to the other lane until that last point.


Whenever we have holiday weekends, the police close off the passing lane part of all the passing lanes, leaving just a single lane. This is a recent change in the last 10 or 15 years (yep, I’m old. 10 or 15 years is recent).
They started implementing it because people were are too stupid to realise that they actually slow things down by overtaking and then merging again when there is really heavy traffic.

I can understand both viewpoints though. @CaffeinatedNoms’ way can be valid if you have two full lines of traffic. It gives a set point to effect the merge and means less for people to get distracted about. Merging too early can actually cause more problems than it fixes. We have an example of this on our way home at night where people are trying to merge cross 2 lanes of traffic to get to an off-ramp on the other side of the road. Except that the off-ramp is 3km down the road and if they used the full merging lane to get up to road speed they would still have plenty of time to get across and wouldn’t hold up all the other traffic.


It doesn’t matter how good your brakes are or if you have a braking assist featuring in your car/truck if the person behind you doesn’t also have it. You might stop in time, but you can’t count on the one behind you being able to.


Had a view to karma cops yesterday.

Stopped at a red traffic light. Car to the left (and front) of my car just kept going. White car stopped next to my car, put on its hazards then drove through the red light as well. I ignored them, no good in getting all worked up.

Light eventually turned green for me, and I continued my voyage home - past the two cars that drove through the red light. It was only then that I saw the traffic cop emblem on the white car’s door, and a traffic warden was busy talking to the driver of the other car.

Felt good the rest of the way home. :slight_smile:


Dear f*ckwad driver in the Toyota,

If you are going to blow through the ‘Give Way’ sign and cut me off, at least have the decency to accelerate like a race car up the freeway on-ramp that I was turning on to.

Doing a staggering 50km/hr is not endearing you to me in any way, shape or form.

I hope you die in a fire.



Dear Toyota Fortuner driver

So you were in a rush and a hurry, and was glued to my a$$ for a while? Shame, really, I do hope you were late for your meeting, tatertat or whatever you were in such a rush for.

I have no sympathy for you, I’m not going to break the speed limit especially for people like you.

And then you have the gall to hoot at me when you passed my car eventually.



I think it’s telling that this thread is the biggest revealer of foreign customs on the forum, as well as local slang.

I’m other news…

I’ve driven past the same Bobcat with a load of gravel like three days in a row, and each time this dude is tooling along the middle of the road playing with his phone.


Is there a company name on it? If I saw the same driver doing that 3 days in a row, I’d call the company and complain. They’re going to kill someone someday.


Is it only me or are blinkenlight indicators getting smaller and smaller?


You’re supposed to be up to freeway speed by the time you get to the end of the onramp. Trying to merge into traffic doing 45 when everyone else is doing 70 is not only dangerous but disrupts the flow of traffic.


It is as if people do not understand the concept of merging on a freeway. Drive me nuts.


It’s whoever the hell the town has contracted with to redo the sewers. It’s well known they are mostly idiots and dangerous. Leaving gaping holes in the road with only a single cone by them and other brilliant things. That being said, they are updating the house to sewer connections for no additional charges on the sewer bills, appears they have been building a fund to do this and got some state money to go with it. So I’m not complaining that hard about not having sewage backups.


Dear Mini-me

I’m not shy. You scratcha my car, I’ll puncha your face with my lawyer.


I like watching dashcam footage of other people going through the same vehicular bullshit as I have to contend with, it creates a kinship.

They’re trialling a scheme here where if you catch someone breaking the law on your dashcam, you can email it to the police and bing they get a fine or summons through the door.

I am no grass, but I have zero fucking care for idiots who drive poorly on the road.


From what I could tell every vehicular law I’ve ever heard of in the States is just an optional guideline in London and Scotland. Driving on the wrong side of the road, parking on sidewalks, u-turns in the middle of the road, three point turns in the middle of the road, parking on the wrong side of the street (Often on teh sidewalk), crossing the center line, speeding, going too slow, crossing multiple lines of traffic at once, parking in the middle of the road, etc…

Oddly enough, it was pretty easy to drive in because everyone appears to expect every car around them to do whatever the hell they want, so the easiest way to get through is to let them do it and move on instead of insisting on silly things like who has the right of way.

And driving to Glen Coe was beautiful, traffic picked up on the way back and it was a bit terrifying at times.


If you read the Highway Code before visiting, it’s genuinely only the rules with numbers printed in red that are legal requirements. The rest are legitimately just guidelines, widely accepted as Best Driving Practice (i.e. if you’re following them and someone else isn’t, court will rule in your favour).

To quote early editions of the Highway Code: To drive on the left, you are sure to be right, but to drive on the right would be wrong

There have been many, many exhaustive studies to try to prove right- or left-hand-drive is superior in a whole plethora of different metrics, and the consensus is that they’re both just fine in that you have an equal chance of surviving as you propel a ton of iron powered by explosions in tubes at truly terrifying speeds :laughing:

Wherever you find streets built before cars were common, you’ll find these practices common. Italy in particular is infamous for everything you’ve mentioned above, to the extent that the rest of us Europeans, who’re all equally guilty of such offences hold them in some sort of horrified awe. When you consider that the average lane width of a road in the USA is close to 11’6 (thanks, Wikipedia), and the average width of a (non-motorway-grade) lane in England squeezes down to 6’6, you can see why we park wherever we damn-well can.

I’ve parked my car at a 30º angle on the supports of a bridge pillar before, because there was no double-yellow line and I was damn well parking this side of the city centre and I am damn proud of my parallel parking skills! :sunglasses:


Yeah, wrong as in the side I’m sure as hell not used to. After the first trip from Edinburgh to Stirling I was OK with it, but starting in downtown was brutal. By the time I was driving back from Ft. Williams I was pretty comfortable, as in even if I panicked I still didn’t go the wrong way.