For anyone not keeping track of UK politics, here is the last few weeks summed up:
Our government has one of the lowest approval ratings ever. Our Prime Minister has the worst approval rating ever. Our Deputy Prime Minister is being investigated for using work computers for pornography acquisition¹. The DUP, the insane Christian fundamentalist party who is keeping Frau Kommandant in charge vetoed the last week’s Brexit negotiations because they refuse to make things as shitty as they were in the 1970s again, so Brexit has stalled. Again. The number of people in poverty has increased by 700,000 (that’s more than 1% of the population). British Industry is at a standstill. More than 3% of the population are now employed in Zero Hours contracts where they are guaranteed a minimum of, you guessed it, zero hours per month.
Black Friday (a new tradition to our shores) saw a whopping 2% of people surveyed by YouGov responding that they bought something in the sales, 78% of people saying that they didn’t, and 14% saying they thought that Black Friday wasn’t even a thing over here; so that capitalist holiday is off to a roaring success.
Visa is estimating that Christmas sales this year are going to be worse than they were in 2008.
The minister in charge of social mobility has quit along with their whole team, citing that our current Government cares so little about the poor that their job is no longer necessary.
The Tory Party is so scared of Labour’s 8-12 point lead in the polls that they’re trying again desperately to say that the Labour Party is divided over the core issue du jour, which happens to be that the Momentum assembly, which is a Socialist core group, is actively threatening moderate Labour ministers, and recently forced a centralist Labour councillor to resign². Because how can Labour be so strong if they’re so divided?
In good news though, I successfully nuked the house so wherever that damn colony of fleas was hiding that managed to attack Boris three times, they’re all dead now. No more itchy kitty.
¹ Hey, at least it was ‘legal pornography’, especially since Frau Kommandant decided to increase the list of forbidden pornographies to include such lame things as breath control and the female orgasm. …Yeah you read that right, technically any porn film that shows a woman coming to climax is illegal in the UK. Yay.
² See now, this didn’t happen. What happened was the centrist councillor was trying to vote for something his constituents hated, so they called for a by-election to get a councillor who didn’t want to vote for the thing they hated. That councillor just happened to be a member of Momentum.