Oh look, another surprise

I swear the company I work for is trying to kill me via aneursym.

So we finally ramped down after our long projects, removed all the temporary resources, our call volume is getting back to normal levels, and the entire desk is relaxing. I’m getting back into my normal weekly groove…

When suddenly on Monday I’m told that there’s a big training class that’s likely going to end up with a prospective new client, and that today I’d have someone out here on the helpdesk tethering with one of my techs to see how we take calls.

Ok, no big deal, I keep a headset splitter around for this kinda thing, and tethered people are pretty low-maintenance on my part, since I don’t really have to do anything. Fine, whatever.

So this morning I get into work and see both (!) of the people sitting there. Good thing I keep two tethers around.

Then I hear the conversation about how the training manager had wandered over this morning before I got into the office and was asking who’s training them and what time they’d be going in for classroom client training.


Turns out that while these people may be going to the prospective new client, they’re just being randomly handed out to various helpdesks around the office for now and will stick on their assigned desk as a resource until such time as either they get pulled off for this new client (if they even sign on with us) or someone else moves and they go to fill the empty slot.

So now I have a new technician I need to classroom train, with zero advance notice, and with most of our training materials being obsolete now because of the projects to roll out the new CRM software. We have no training materials beyond knowledge objects (which aren’t in any sort of classroom-friendly format) and half of our non-CRM training materials are half-updated, since unlike pretty much every other helpdesk in this building, our client doesn’t pay for a dedicated trainer, so it falls on my shoulders as the account supervisor. This also means that while I’m classroom training, I can’t do my normal supervisory duties.

Not to mention that I know for a fact that our client didn’t approve an additional resource, so I have no idea who’s paying for this new technician, and I have no idea if the client will even approve another set of technician credentials for a tech on this desk that, for all intents and purposes, didn’t exist until today.

Man, I cannot wait until my next week of PTO…

I feel your pain. It’s like everything that can be done wrong is what your guys are doing. I recommend drinking until you just don’t care, then staring at the TV while super hero movies are on. It’s pretty much what’s gotten me through this past year.

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Oh, it gets better.

That new person they gave me to train? No technical sense whatsoever.

I can normally have someone come through my training and be ready to be by themselves on the phones, for the most part, within 2 weeks. This one has had more than 2 weeks and is nowhere close to ready. Her only computer experience is working for IBM as a data entry person…when they used terminals.

I’m now trying my best to get the training manager to let her go. She won’t survive in this company.

I trained, for two days, a person who claimed computer literacy on her resume and didn’t even know simple keyboard commands for cut and paste. She quit after two days, thanking her employer for the opportunity. To prove she was a lying idiot.

She’s still here. I was off all of Thanksgiving Week and somehow I come back and she’s still here. What? How? SHE’S STILL NOT READY TO TAKE CALLS? Why hasn’t someone gotten the shotgun out yet and started the walk to the chemical shed?

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I was “supervisor” and main trainer at the poison pit, and my boss only took my suggestions as the weakest of influence.

We hired a new employee who had temp’ed for us, and impressed us both. She did what was asked quickly, only had to be told once, and went looking for more when her tasks were complete.
Somewhere between temp and hired she must have had a brain wash, 'cause she couldn’t do cr@p, nor learn anything.
At 30 days, 60 days, and 90 days I recommended we offer her an apology and show her the door. Boss hag insisted we keep her, because of the sob story that was her life.
The trainee was blaming ME for her inability to learn, so I suggested we team her up with another employee, instead.

She never did get up to speed, blamed everyone but herself, and left right before she was going to be terminated… finally.

< shudder >

So yeah, e4tmyl33t, I knows from where you speak.

Cut a long story short, I do IT support for headoffice, plus a couple of other sites all over the country.

We usually have a technician (sort of computer literate to do basic things) on site (all of them, so more than one tech). In the past it worked well.

All of a sudden one tech resigns, and HR replace said resignee with a new tech - with zero PC literacy…

… and it’s fun trying to get said clueless tech to do even the basic things.