Officially Retired

I am now completely out of the ‘taking money for computer work’ business. I’m not going back for love or money. I’ll be completely honest, there is not enough money in the world to make me go back. It’s pretty much like when I walked out of the lab, determined to never go back.

I’m going to concentrate on my writing while watching our country burn to the ground. Then I will rebuild in the ashes and get back to productive work. But, for here, for today, I would like to list things I will never have to witness again:

  • IT idiots run malware scans on PCs because their network is overwhelmed and their company will not update/upgrade their current system
  • Huge networks cobbled together with chewing gum and chicken wire. Yes, I have actually seen this with my own eyes.
  • People so stupid about computers but think they know them because they can log into their FaceBook account on their Obamaphone.
  • Idiots who don’t know what ‘line command’ means
  • Idiots who ask me what DOS was like
  • Morons who ask what Linux is (I nearly slapped an IT supervisor for that one)
  • IT monkeys so stupid they don’t realize their have admin rights to a machine
  • IT departments who give all newbies the same damned password to log in.
  • IT departments who are surprised when they experience a security breech when they do the above.
  • Mouth breathing morons slapping at a computer keyboard and smacking gum while on a phone call and being told that this is a prized employee.
  • Late night phone calls when overwhelmed servers die because they lack the processing power and hard drive space to do the work required of them
  • Mid-morning phone calls when an AS400 (yes, they do exist, still) dies because no one has bothered to update it in 3 years
  • Looking at an entire IT department stare at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train when I ask why the AS400 hasn’t been taken down for maintenance in three years and only one person has the balls to admit it’s a VPs fault.

I’m looking forward to quiet. Turned off the work cell, no one has the personal cell or my home phone number. I am going to take about a week and completely decompress. I have not had a vacation in over 8 years, and I took a week off to move into the new house, then.

I still hate people and will avoid them like they’re trying to sell me religion. And yes, I shall watch TV, lots and lots of TV.


When you’ve had some time off, are you going to resume your war stories? If I remember right, there was a story you shared recently about a company that ignored your professional recommendation, and when they came back later to try and get you to do it then, you pointed to the “it will cost more if I do it later” clause in the contract. They put their company at risk of collapsing because of this.

Our IT department does that and it drives me nuts (short drive - more like a long putt). Of course it came in handy when they upgraded all our machines to W7 Enterprise and reset all our passwords, but didn’t bother to let us know what the new passwords were. They told me mine, only because I had to spend 15 minutes tracking down someone in IT who actually had my laptop, and I was able to tell everyone else their’s when they were bemoaning the fact they couldn’t log in.

When I set up passwords for our HRIS, everyone gets their own personalised password and is forced to change it when they log in.

BTW, congrats on the retirement, Sev!

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Are you going to knit, too? If so: Pics, please! :smile:

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We want photos of your feet up on the couch, with the tiger slippers on!

I have been knitting. I’m getting dangerously close to teaching myself fair isle /shudder.

I would take photos if A) I had not lost the cable to my digital camera and B) if I had not drowned a 2nd iPhone in a 6 month time span. I’m on the dumbest of Dumb Phones until I can prove I’m not a phonicidal maniac. I agree with my husband’s ruling on this and didn’t even mention that he had already killed 2 iPhones in less than a year. I’m turning a new leaf in not blamethrowing.

I’m working on some war stories, but I have to make damned sure I do not violate any NDAs I may or may not have signed in doing so. It’s a delicate balance.

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Speaking of Balance, has he made an appearance here yet?

Haven’t seen him here yet. I’d like to, though.

Took a moment, the instant thingie said you officially retired (as it was the thread you commented on) and I almost spit my coffee.

I wish! I don’t have enough money saved to do that yet.